I’m temporarily single again because Charo’s in a week-long business trip in Spain. I know that it would probably take some time before I can visit that country but that doesn’t stop me from planning my own itinerary. And so friends, without further ado, I present to you what I would do if I were in Spain:
1. Always look at my back just in case they do a running of the bulls dry run.
2. Go to an Ibiza DJ and ask if he can include Mighty Dub Katz’s Magic Carpet Ride (that’s the Aringkingking song for you mortals) in his lineup.
3. Address each staircase as “The Spanish Steps.”
4. Go to a bakery and ask in Español: Un Spanish Bread por favor.
5. Wear my shirt that says You conquered our country for 300 years and all I got was this stupid t-shirt.
6. When someone asks me a question, I would always answer Quando es el mejor tiempo para visitar te? (Go Google it!)
7. Loop Volare in my iPod.
8. Always wear a smile thinking that they traveled around the world only to be killed by a Philippine fish.
9. Look for Muzzy – my Spanish 101 videomate.
10. Check out if it’s true that the rain in Spain stays mainly on the plain.
Fuck You, Diabetes 
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